53 Comments
User's avatar
Cynthia Francillon's avatar

Aside from this being stunningly written, I just devoured this on my train ride while intermittently thinking about the r’ships that I willingly let turn me against myself and the yearning I have to one day never have to do that again. Which, no matter how “right” the person feels with you, you’ll always have to navigate the confinements of. That question of “AM I ENOUGH?” plaguing you and you looking for answers in these dynamics when it’s a conversation for yourself. Oof. I appreciate this post.

Expand full comment
Anjola <3's avatar

I've never truly dated anyone and yet I completely relate to the feeling of uncertainty in being, and compromising while others stay steadfast in their identity. This was beautifully written.

Expand full comment
biglittlemia's avatar

This was a story I didn't want to be over. Love your writing style and related a little too much 🫣

Expand full comment
Mary McDermott's avatar

This really resonated with me, thank you for sharing! I feel like in my past relationships I definitely molded myself around other people, and lost myself in the process. Since May I've completely taken a break from dating partly for this reason - I want to spend more time with myself, so that when I meet the someone again, it will feel right as I can be more of my own person. Excellent post!

Expand full comment
GHOST's avatar

what a hard thing to write about and a hard thing to admit about your love but it's so worth it to work thru ... i assume. still working on it too.

Expand full comment
Alex thee Black Femme ⚢'s avatar

I live for Black sapphic experiences and pieces 🥹 Whether it’s struggle, honeymoon love, or Black lesbians that have grown old together, I’m so grateful to read about the experiences of women who love women. Thank you for heart out pouring in this. I wish you more compassionate revelations about the power of solitude and partnership.

Expand full comment
Ralph Bryant's avatar

I was sad to get to the end. It was so beautifully written

Expand full comment
Travis Alabanza's avatar

Such a beautiful read

Expand full comment
Recovering Miss Independent's avatar

I’m encouraged to be more comfortable alone ! Thanks for sharing Andy <3

Expand full comment
Snoopy's avatar

Omg this crushed me in the best way

Expand full comment
ava's avatar

beautiful, inspiring storytelling. enjoy your kale :)

Expand full comment
Martha's avatar

This was beautiful - You’re an exceptional storyteller Andy! May there be many more beautiful kale filled mornings to come 💚💚

Expand full comment
andy nwannem's avatar

thank you, Martha! to more kale! 🥬💚

Expand full comment
Tiana Dashay's avatar

Andy the storyteller in you ignites the story teller in me. Thank you so much. I’m currently navigating some of these same feelings.

Expand full comment
andy nwannem's avatar

thank you for such a sweet comment <3 wishing you the best of luck on your journey - you got this!

Expand full comment
Tiana Dashay's avatar

thank you so much & you’re welcome!!

Expand full comment
Kylie LaCour's avatar

I relate to this so deeply <3

Expand full comment
andy nwannem's avatar

love you, Kylie 💚

Expand full comment
St. South's avatar

“A good partner, the right partner, is a home.” 😭❤️ so true

Expand full comment
karla nicole's avatar

Oh okay so I'm crying now that's cool. Your literary voice is so incredibly captivating, thank you for your vulnerability and I couldn't relate more to everything that you've said. Regardless of farmers market companionship, homes turned to ash, or carpets torn to shreds; I'm certain you will be pleasantly surprised with what you can build with just your own two hands.

Expand full comment